Back after an impromptu holiday hiatus:
- Today's weight: 195.5 lb
- Change since last weigh-in: 0 lb
- Cumulative weight loss: 138.5 lb
- Average weekly weight change: -1.39 lb
Considering all the various holiday weirdnesses, culinary and general, of the past couple of weeks, I'm overjoyed to still be on that plateau. Sure beats gaining some weight!
I mean, even if I had gained a couple of pounds, I would refrain from personal recriminations and simply set myself to working it off, the same as I always have. But I'm just as glad I don't have to go there.
I do have to note that this year the holiday foods have been calling to me a lot more than last Christmas/Hanukkah/Solstice/New Year's. And I had allowed myself to give in to that call a little more than last year. So, as I said in the last post, I'm definitely feeling a low-level sense of too-muchness. I can't tell if it's physical or psychological, but I'm really feeling a need to wean myself back off even the modest dose of richer foods I've indulged in.
And it is going to be a weaning-off process. I can now feel that weird, hyper, rushy feeling in my head when I think about food, that if left to run wild could become the seed of a crave/compulsion episode. I suspect only people who have done any sort of old-fashioned dieting would be familiar with this feeling--that somehow the food is "calling" to you, in a way that's as hard to dismiss as a song that gets stuck in your head.
I associate that rushy feeling with my old friend the Lizard Brain, trying to wake up, take control of my psyche, and snap at something--usually, though not always, food! As a matter of fact, now that I write that, I've been uncommonly bitchy over the past few weeks. Maybe coincidence, maybe more related to other stressors in my life than food ... but still something to mind. After all, friends can be very understanding, but even the most loyal friend can stand only so much bitchiness before they haul off and tell you to stuff it.
(For any friends reading this to whom I've been bitchy in recent days--once again I apologize profusely, and be assured that I'm working really hard to deal with my crap. And many thanks for your continued patience with these technical difficulties...)
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